How to cheer up jokes. Funny positive jokes for the mood. Receipt from the store - Cool jokes to cheer you up

Have a great mood everyone!

Funny and cool sms for a guy or man will be a great addition to your good mood. After all, these SMS will cheer up the guy and set him up for positive communication with you.

To make funny SMS cheer up your boyfriend and for him to respond to you, send them to him when you know that he is free and not busy with important things.

  • Imagine, I went fishing today. I caught crucian carp and perch. But only you are the fish of my dreams.
  • If you're in a bad mood, my SMS is designed to cheer you up! Did not work out? Then come, I’ll pick up everything you need.
  • I want to make you an offer. Would you like to go with me...on vacation?
  • You and I are like Bonnie and Clyde, Winnie and Piglet, Harry Potter and his wand!
  • All I have to do is clean up the mess, and I'm ready for the marathon.
  • The most pleasant time of the day is when you meet me after work.
  • Honey, could you pick me up after work? I forgot my mortar and broom at home.
  • There are 8 hours, 480 minutes, 28800 seconds left until we meet. 28799…28798…28797…
  • When I'm sad, I think about you and smile. I hope this SMS brought a smile to your face too.
  • Of course, I understand everything, but I also need to work: how to drive away thoughts about you?
  • When you don't smile, there is only one little penguin in the world who is sad. You don't want to torment the poor bird, do you?
  • Today I learned that there is a belief that all thin people are witches. I'll go eat before they burn me at the stake.
  • Today you and I will do something unusual, exciting, something that you love to do for a very long time - we will play a console)
  • No type of coffee charges me with so much positivity and energy as thinking about you.

Funny SMS jokes for a guy are the same ones that lift your spirits and show a sense of humor towards each other for the two of you.

  • I want us to have more in common. Let's get... a kitten?
  • I bought myself a T-shirt with a photo of the same football player who missed yesterday. Tonight you can take revenge on him for his loss.
  • Today I will give you a suitcase of money. There is a sale of animated gifts on Odnoklassniki)
  • Darling, I don’t know how to tell you...Well, in general, I took a test...and it turns out we are the perfect couple!
  • Today you didn’t let me sleep, gently biting my ear and buzzing something passionately... Where are you, my mosquito?

Briefly about me now: naked and waiting for you!

  • I want to be a ray of light that illuminates your path even on the stormiest day.
  • You are my bunny, I am your ray of light! There is no cooler couple in the world for you and me!
  • I want you and me to become birds. Preferably migratory. And they flew to the sea for a couple of weeks.
  • Today I caught the bride’s bouquet quite by accident. Dont you want to say me something?
  • Today you will find hugs, treats and one non-stop “donimka”.
  • Let's take it to the next level? Let's “like” each other on VK!
  • I want it so much...I want it so much, I can’t bear it...I want to lift your...mood!
  • U many. L askovic. Y sincere. B sparing. N hedgehog AND maned WITH small. b
  • For your sake, today I’m even ready to watch 22 men in shorts running across the field.

In addition to funny and cool SMS for a guy, there are other messages that also lift your spirits. For example, look

Greetings dear visitors to the site, today we have selected funny positive jokes for you. This small list of funny stories and jokes, traditionally accompanied by interesting and funny pictures, will definitely lift your mood, no matter what it is.

Don’t forget to visit us often for a new portion of fun and positive experiences.

***
I work as a salesperson in a digital equipment store, one day after work I was sitting in a bar and stared at a beautiful girl next to me, she noticed this and asked: “Did you want something, young man?” I said, “No, I’m just watching.”

***
- Hello, Seryoga! My wife got pregnant!!
- Why are you calling me right away? I wasn’t even in the city that day...

***
There is a meeting in the office. Chief:
- Whoever has a higher education, please raise your right hand. I said right!

***
- Dad, dad, I will never go sledding with you again.
- Stop whining, let's take it!

***
- What are you going to do this weekend?
- I haven’t been on the couch for a long time, a lot of things have accumulated there...

***
From the tablet's point of view, a person is a discharge device.

***
Alexander Sergeevich Pushkin is the first Russian rapper.
He also rhymed, had African roots, and died in a shootout.

***
- Mishanya, did you serve in the army?
- No, Sash, I didn’t serve. They didn't take me...
- Why didn’t they take you?
- We couldn’t find...

***
I used to lead a very active life: I played tennis, football, billiards, played chess, and took part in auto racing. But it all ended when the computer died.

***
Two grannies are sitting on a bench, one says to the other:
– Do you remember, we were once young and beautiful, especially me. And now the old and scary ones, especially you!

***
— Why were you late for work?
— Left home late.
“Couldn’t you have gone out earlier?”
- It was too late to leave earlier.

***
Having reached the house by taxi, the man silently gets out and begins to nervously rummage through his pockets, and mutters under his breath:
-I think I dropped my wallet in the car...
Hearing this, the taxi driver sharply presses the gas and drives away. A man smiling contentedly:
-And Robinovich’s method still works...

Hello, friends! Today we have funny jokes to cheer you up. Laughter heals, and we will do laughter therapy. Read 10 jokes that will make you laugh. Look at and published earlier.

Sweetie -

At the pharmacy -

Salesman:
- So how is it?! Did the healing mud you bought last time help improve your wife's appearance?
Buyer:
- Yes, but only the first two days. And then she disappeared...

Receipt from the store - Cool jokes to cheer you up


Traffic cop and airbag - Cool jokes to cheer you up


Model agency - Cool jokes to lift your spirits.

Hello! Is this a modeling agency?
- Yes.
- How much do you pay models?
- We pay well, but we only accept with parameters 90-60-90.
- Well, there are no problems with this, everything matches with me - height, age and weight...

Students arrived for practice - doctors... - Cool jokes to cheer you up


We once sent two “crazy” medical students, Lekha and Dimka, to our clinic as trainees. They laughed in a black way. The entire staff didn’t know what to do, whether to die laughing or complain about their friends to the dean’s office.

I especially remember one incident...

In the morning, the friends liked to eat something they had taken from the hostel, but that day their meal was only enough for a loaf of bread and a bottle of lemonade. In the middle of the process of absorbing food, the door to the utility room in which they were eating opened slightly, and a charming girl’s face appeared in the doorway, asking, “Is this a laboratory?” Immediately taking on an important look, Lekha asked:

- Yes, but what do you want?

“Yes, let’s get tested,” and the girl blushed.

- Oh, what do you have there? – Dimka immediately picked up

“This is... urine,” the girl whispered.

- When did you recruit?

- As ordered - until six in the morning:

- Oh, fresh! Bring it to the table, otherwise we’re drinking yesterday’s stuff. – Lekha pointed his finger at a glass filled with a yellowish liquid. The girl turned very pale, but gave the jar back.

- This is all? – Dimka asked with genuine annoyance?

“Yes...” the girl muttered even more quietly, “Do you need anything else?”

It’s good that the nurse passing by had ammonia on hand for the green girl slowly sliding down the wall.

A woman walks home late at night alone through the park.

Late in the evening a woman walks home through the park. Suddenly he hears:
- Stand!
She stopped.
- Lie!
She lay down.
- Crawl!
She crawled.
Suddenly, sympathetically over your ear:
- Woman, are you feeling bad? I’m working with the dog here, and I see you crawling...


Husband and wife - Cool jokes to lift your spirits.


A lion fell into a deep hole - Cool jokes to lift your spirits.

A lion fell into a deep hole,
And a tree grows nearby.
A monkey jumps on the branch of this tree and rejoices:
- Well, the cat is all torn, you got it! Claws for beads, teeth for souvenirs, a skin instead of a rug, they will nail your head to the wall, that’s what you want!
And so on for half an hour. Then the branch breaks and the monkey falls into the lion’s hole:
- You won’t believe it, Lev! I came down to apologize!

A funny joke about an Odessa resident who decided to get married - Cool jokes to lift your spirits.

Izya once visited a resort and returned home with his fiancée Sarochka. He decided to call all his friends to introduce them to his chosen one. Sarochka set the table, put on her best dress and was very nice to all the guests, everything went just wonderful.

It was time for the guests to leave; one of them, saying goodbye to Izya, called him aside and said:

Izya, my dear man! You're out of your mind to marry this girl! Don't you know that she walked with all the men in Yalta?

Izya didn’t answer anything, returned to the house and turned to Sarochka:

My gold, forgive me, but I can’t marry you, I was told that you had many other men!

Izechka, my fish, am I not satisfied with you as a lady of my heart? - Sarah answered.

No, Sarochka, what are you doing!

Then maybe I'm not a good cook?

No, darling. I am absolutely delighted with your dishes.

Oh, are you saying that I don’t know how to receive guests well?

On the contrary, my precious, you are doing great!

- So, Izechka, in your opinion, I learned this in correspondence courses?!

Friends, write in the comments what do you think of these jokes? What other jokes do you like, write, we’ll laugh together! Laughter heals!



gastroguru 2017